Matthew Hayden pleads with team mates to act their age

That's Hayden in the middle. Having previously reconciled himself to the ageing process, Hayden is now trying to persuade his teammates to be just as accepting, but to no avail.

Just because you're sportsmen doesn't mean you're young enough to wear tracksuits or, heaven forbid, sunglasses on your head. That's strike two against Gilchrist and Ponting. You're both well into your thirties. There's no shame in a sensible pair of action slacks and a turtle-necked woolly jumper, you know.

They could be wearing those clothes because they're extra comfy, we suppose, but it's unlikely. They look to be a bit of a snug fit and have an air of trendiness which is entirely inappropriate.