Nick Compton tips the cup of runs

Nick Compton hasn't appeared to be as run-thirsty as usual so far this season. He's taken a couple of sips of runs, but no large mouthful and certainly nothing approaching a quaff.

Yesterday, he hit his first hundred of the season, 110 not out, as Middlesex lost to Sussex in the catchily-named Friends Provident Trophy. The cup of runs has been tipped and Nick Compton will drink.

Drink, Nick. Drink! May your pull shots wet your lips. May your leg-glances fill your mouth. May your cover drives nearly drown you.

Drink! Drink from the cup of runs until it appears almost empty, then produce a second, slightly larger cup of runs and drink from that. When that runs dry, reveal to us that you have taken the opportunity to refill the first cup while you were drinking from the second. Drain the first cup once again.

Surprise us with a third cup of unusual dimensions and with an embossed design - drink from that. Attempt to drink from all three cups of runs simultaneously in a conspicuous attempt to persuade Peter Moores of your unquenchable thirst for runs.

Drink, Nick Compton! DRINK!

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Thursday, June 14, 2007


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17 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

What do you, like, think about Nick Compton,

I like him, I think, but I soooo fancy him King Cricket,

Is he as cute as you?


xx

11:53 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes King Cricket, are you as cute as Nick Compton?
Although I actually know the answer - mighty cute!

12:04 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When exactly did King Cricket become a stalkers' forum?

The only stalking we encourage is that of Robert Key and only then because it's warranted.

12:20 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Briony, I once met King Cricket outside Rob Key's house and I can confirm he is NOT as cute as Nick. Or Rob for that matter.

12:48 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

seriously though guys,

has anyone ever met King Cricket?

if he is as cute as he is funny he must be sooooooo cute!

2:52 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can attest that he is neither cute, nor funny in the flesh. More like and an ugly dullard; a malformed bore if you will.

Honestly.

3:28 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Briony, this is the first Anonymous (not responsible for the next 2 posts). Ignore Anonymous 3 -I really have met King Cricket and he is a handsome slim fella

10:14 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello Briony and anonymouses.

Anonymous 3 here. I too have really met him. I never said he wasn't slim. He is. Like a bean pole noted for it's slim nature. Not as thin as a starving victorian orphan, but not a wide as a well fed afghan hound.
And ugly is a little harsh. I retract that. I would have said plain, but that doesn't take in to account his unique facial features. It's more like an ikea coffee table: well designed, with some interesting points, but ultimately utterly forgettable. And it comes in a flat pack that you have to put you your self and you always have piece left over at the end.

10:08 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

you are all just teasing me!

is he cute!!??

somebody could pm me a photo if I give you the address??????

I'm not a stalker!!

He just makes me laugh

xx

12:03 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

*nudges b&b*

I think you've pulled, mate.

As long as "briony" doesn't turn out to be a 40-year-old trucker from Stoke, I reckon you should go for it!

*hands b&b a copy of Barry White's Greatest Hits*

1:45 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

*Blue and Brown sheepishly accepts Barry White's Greatest Hits*

So, Briony? What's your handle? "Rubber Duck", "Spider Mike"?

*Waits to see if Briony gets dated Convoy reference which will conclusively prove or disprove his/her trucker status*

2:04 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like you guys!

you tease me but you aren't mean, some internet people are just horrible but you are fun,

no mahinda I'm not a trucker, but OMG is blue and brown king cricket?

aaaaaargh!!!!!!!!!

2:23 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Perhaps this is us.

3:23 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

> no mahinda I'm not a trucker,

Prove it!

> but OMG is blue and brown king cricket?

Oh no! I've let the secret out!

By day, mild-mannered Blue and Brown wears glasses and tweed to work, at his humdrum office job.

However, when there's a cricketing emergency, he nips into the nearest phone box and dons his whites to become...

*drum roll*

Faster than a delivery from Shoaib!

Able to leap tall stumps in a single bound!

Capable of out-drinking David Boon!

Is it a pigeon? Is it a slice of chocolate cake?

No, it's KING CRICKET!

*fanfare*


He has to go quite a long way to find a proper red phone box, these days.

4:09 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Does anyone think we might be overdoing it with our crown-cape-glasses look?

Nah.

4:28 pm  
Blogger scott c said...

I think that Briony is a creation of KingCricket, designed to give the impression that he's popular with the ladies, and so drive all his other lady fans [sic] insane with jealousy to the point where they start sending him underwear through the post, begging him to elope with them.

I met a lady once, but I don't talk to them any more. I have TMS instead.

9:45 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe she's a Weird Science style creation.

11:31 am  

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